I woke up this morning and a portrait of John's gospel came to my mind and before I knew it I found myself amused and awed at the same time. One day, Jesus was doing what he did best: he was teaching. He had already fed these people with bread and fish and he begins to perceive that the crowd was simply waiting for the next meal. Now, I know I mentioned yesterday that first century Palestine was a difficult place to live; so, free bread from an itinerant sage was definitely going to garner attention. Jesus realizing that the people were striving for literal bread and not wanting them to miss the point, says something astounding:
53 So Jesus said to them, "Very truly, I tell you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. 54 Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood have eternal life, and I will raise them up on the last day; 55 for my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink. 56 Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood abide in me, and I in them.Now, let me tell you something, that creeps me out even to this day! I have the advantage of 2000 plus years of church teaching and theology as it relates to this passage. My library is packed full of books that deal with sacramental theology. But, even still, at face value, it freaks me out. I can only imagine what it did to those Jews listening and waiting for their next meal.John 6:53-56 (NRSV)
Are we really to believe that Jesus himself did not know that what he was about to say was going to literally freak out the crowd? Did he truly expect them to understand all that? I mean, think about it, the church split between East and West over issues related to this concept (among others, granted) some ten centuries after Jesus supposedly said this. There is to this day major confusion between Catholic and Protestant theology as it relates to the Eucharist and Communion. Why would Jesus utter such difficult and ultimately divisive words?
Personally, my first inclination is to say that he didn't. But, that's just too easy. Even if the actual historical Jesus did not utter these words as we have them today, and I know them thare(sic) are fighting words for some, the development of church doctrine and tradition hinges securely on this and other passages as it relates to sacramental theology: salvation.
So, what do we do with stuff like this? Throw it away? Put it aside? Say it isn't so? See, I think Jesus was fully aware of the difficulty of what he was saying and knew that noone was really going to get it. But, there were twelve men beside him that he had to know whether they would truly follow him or not.
The crowd sees the statement as too much and they disperse and we're left with Jesus and his disciples, alone. Jesus turns to them and ask them what must of been a difficult question: "will you also go away?" Not, do you understand? Can you cannibalize me? No! Will you go away too? Ah! What a powerful question. So your freaked out, you don't understand, you don't know which bible is right, what church to go too, who to trust, what to do. Jesus, however, has a very simple question, "will you go away too?."
I laughed out loud this morning as the Lord gently let me know that it's just okay not to understand. I don't need to understand how he laid the foundations of the earth. I don't need to know how he flung the stars into the heavens and set the boundaries of the sea. I don't have to have a clue how he sits upon the circle of the earth, the nations but drops in his bucket. I can't solve poverty, rid the world of disease and pain. I don't know if people are born this or that or where the line should be drawn regarding the ethic of life. There are so many things today that I don't know... but really, the Holy Spirit whispered in my ear saying, "are you going away too?" And I must say, no! A resounding, NO! Because even though I don't understand, I do know, as Peter said in reply, "only you have the words of life."(68, my paraphrase)
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