I wasn't going to write today. It's been a rough week, both physically and otherwise. But, I feel compelled to write something that has been on my mind all morning. There is a scripture in Ephesians where Paul is admonishing couples. Let's look at it real quick:
25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27 That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. 28 So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29 For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30 For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. 31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. 32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. Eph 5:24-33 (KJV)
Before I go further, let me just say that I am not a marriage expert. In fact, I am the exact opposite! So, what I write can be taken any way you choose, but it's more for me today that I write.
Paul begins his admonition here with a statement (one that I did not include) about women submitting to their husbands and that the man is the head of the wife. Now, I am not going to deal with that part at all because the weightier matter is before us. Husbands, love your wives. Now, why did he say that? Love your wives? This instruction to love your wife is repeated numerous times in the canon of writings ascribed to Paul. I remember reading this one time and thinking, if a man has to be told to love his wife, he has a serious problem. Love is the very foundation of marriage, is it not?
The narrative of Jacob, the Old Testament patriarch, has always fascinated me. He is a dichotomy, almost a contradiction, all wrapped up in one person. He falls within the chosen line, his patriarchal succession is forever established, and his people are actually named after him (after God changed his name to Israel- Ge. 32; more on that in a moment).
That name, Jacob, only furthers the obvious contraction within this man. Names were more important back in the time when Jacob was born. Most of us are familiar with the negative connotations of Jacob's name; but, it actually had both a positive side as well as a negative. The Jacob we're talking about today, however, was saddled with the negative part. I think of the second (and in that day, insignificant) of two twins, who came out of the womb holding on to his brother's heel. When I hear the name, I think of the one who faked his brother's countenance and smell and took advantage of his father's senility, stealing the birthright from his own sibling. I think of the man who was a coward and ran from his brother's wrath after it was discovered what he had done. There really is nothing flattering about the early days of this man's life.
Bear with me here because we're headed somewhere this morning. The name Jacob was not necessarily fraught with negative connotations. In many cases throughout scripture, the name (when used to denote someone other than this Jacob) was associated with the a verb tense that spoke directly of God: Jacob-El, meaning God rewards. Thus, the contradiction. In this man there was both a sovereign divine blessing and alongside it, a propensity to be everything that we think of when he hear the name associated with this figure in Hebrew scriptures.
In this I find great comfort because I can relate. When I read that God is the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob... notice, not Israel, but Jacob. Not, the Jacob-el, the one that God rewards or the one who follows hard after to serve or protect. No! He, meaning God, is over and over again named as the God of the heel grabber, the one who follows hard after with evil intent to harm or supplant. When I see this, it actually makes me hopeful!
Step with me for a moment into the New Testament. Paul is writing to the Corinthians, and things are not well. They are arguing over stupid stuff, they have forgotten where they came from, their being childish and immature, and all kinds of evil nasty stuff is happening in the church. This first letter to them was scathing at the very least; Paul dealt decisively with their sin and the disharmony and all the negative stuff and toxic people who were being allowed to wreak havoc on this church.
What I find interesting, however, is his opening remarks to them. He is just about to wield the sword and speak some very needed and uncomfortable correction into these people's lives. But, look at how he addresses them:
2 We are writing to the church of God in Corinth, you who have been called by God to be his own holy people. He made you holy by means of Christ Jesus, just as he did all Christians everywhere—whoever calls upon the name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and theirs.
1 Cor 1:2 (NLT)
Wait just a moment! The kind of sin that was permeating Corinth is of the kind that most churches never recover from. It's the kind that everyone in town knows about. This was that church; you know the one, the one everybody talks about and mostly, its true! Paul here identifies them as the church of God that was in Corinth. He wasn't talking to sinners, unredeemed, unbaptized people. He was talking to the church of God, period. In the King James, he further identifies them as the the ones who were sanctified, called aside, made holy, put back into their proper place, so to speak, in relationship with him.
This goes against the grain of Church Etiquette 101, right? Observe what Paul says to them right before he begins to levy discipline upon them:
8 He will keep you strong right up to the end, and he will keep you free from all blame on the great day when our Lord Jesus Christ returns. 9 God will surely do this for you, for he always does just what he says, and he is the one who invited you into this wonderful friendship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.
1 Cor 1:8-9 (NLT)
Now, what does all this mean and how does it tie in to Jacob? Simple. We are not perfect. It really doesn't matter how long you've been in the church or been a Christian or a person of faith, fact is, we are all human. And as such, we hold within our own selves this very same dichotomy, contradiction, as Jacob's name denotes. Yet, we also hold within these earthen, imperfect (listen!) broken, untrustworthy, lost, blemished, soiled vessels, a treasure that speaks of better things than what we are or were.
I find it interesting that when Jacob wrestled with the Angel across the ford of Jabbok, his name was changed to Israel because the Angel said that he had wrestled with God and prevailed and had power with both man and God. Yet, at the very same time, he was afflicted with a hip disorder that plagued him his entire life. He limped, wasn't perfect anymore, his weaknesses and shame and affliction was all out there for everyone to see.
Here is when the "but" in my title comes in. I usually name my post after I've written them. However, this morning my wife and I were riding down the road talking about something that was rather unpleasant and uncomfortable. And, in the middle of it, I said "but....," and never really finished what I was saying. When I said that, I heard Paul writing to these very same Corinthians:
9 not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, 10 Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And such were some of you:but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God.
1 Cor 6:9-11 (KJV)
All I could get out of my mouth was "but...," followed by, "and it's a very big BUT!" Yeah, I have been a heel grabber and a fraud and trusting me would burn you every time. I was a drug addict, an alcoholic, a fornicator, adulterer and unfaithful in every possible way. In fact, I read the list above and I find myself almost amused (cause there are just some things that you'd cry over if you didn't laugh) in some ways because because I make the whole list. It wasn't just one thing that drug me down into the pits of hell, it was all of it. Fact is, Jacob was and in many ways, still is, in my nature.
But! God, the treasure within me, the One whom Paul proclaims in another place to be rich in mercy (Eph 2:4), says that I am washed, set apart, justified, given a new name. Sure, my limp is never going to heal--here; I will always carry within me some semblance, if you will, of who I was. And, to be honest, I have resented that, because in my impatient, self-absorbed nature, when I change, by God I want you to know it. Look at me! I am new man....
As I reflect upon this semblance, this part of me that will never let me forget who I was, I begin to see why it's so important. The limp was the very grace of God in Jacob's life. It never allowed him to forget where he came from, who he was before that climactic encounter with God. I remember the void--the depths of despair and pain and I never want to be that man again. And while I would love to say that I am healed and perfect and every thing in my life and world is where it needs to be... fact is, that simply isn't the truth. There are days, hours, minutes, when Jacob rises to the surface and I am humbled by my own darkness and propensity to be someone, something, that I today, despise.
I limp, and I always will. But, it's in those times when I am blinded by my own folly, shame, and sin, and my limp is all I can see, it behooves me to remember, that He IS, and by His grace, always will be, the God of Abraham, Isaac, AND Jacob!
Below you will find a list of Pentecost Sunday Blog Post included in the Christian Century (Magazine) network of Blogs., Inclusion does not indicate agreement with the philosophy or spiritual orientation of Eclectic Faith.
Theolog - Donna Schaper writes about a double miracle.
I-YOUniverse - John Hamilton confesses that the Holy Spirit resides in his heart but not in his mouth.
Reflectionary - Martha Hoverson is asked to do a funeral the week before Pentecost .
Don't Eat Alone - Milton Brasher-Cunningham offers us a Pentecost poem .
Welcoming Spirit - Paula Jenkins struggles to understand the nature of the Holy Spirit.
Just Words - Ed Sunday-Winters reflects on the age of the Church. Almost 2000 years old, and yet Pentecost reminds us that the present experience of the Spirit is the locus of our power.
Unorthodoxology - David Henson: "I wonder if they still continue to speak in the tongues of men and of angels, because that is the only language they now understand."
Life and Faith - Ernesto Tinajero remembers a seminary professor who called the Holy Spirit, "Holy Breath."
Everyday Liturgy - Thomas Turner: "The Holy Spirit is more than a placeholder to complete the Trinity."
Where the Wind - Fiction by Adam Thomas: Davies writes a paper on the Holy Spirit.
I have never been able to relate to Jesus, the God, very well. The Jesus who steps up to a tomb and calls forth a dead man back to life is a person I find difficult to comprehend. Whether he's feeding 5000 men, women and children, picking prostitutes up off of dusty streets, healing the sick or causing blind men to see and dead men to live or forgiving sins, it is just beyond me. And, to be honest, I don't think that I would be here today if that was the only portrait of him that I see in scripture. It's not that I don't or can't believe in those things, because I can and do. But, intimately, I need a Savior with a bit more vulnerability so that I can trust that he understands and knows what I am going through.
So, when I think of Jesus, the portrait that comes to mind the most is that of a man, who starts out from Pilate's condemnation, carrying his own cross. Notice how John puts it:
So they took Jesus and led him away. 17 Carrying the cross by himself, Jesus went to the place called Skull Hill (in Hebrew, Golgotha).
John 19:16-17 (NLT, emphasis added)
We wouldn't know this if it wasn't for the other men's renditions of the story, but both Matthew and Luke (and we'll ignore Mark with it's questionable ending for a moment) both name a man, a Cyrene (North Africa), named Simon, who was in Jerusalem that day, obviously there to observe the Passover. Because of the severe beating and loss of blood that Jesus endured, he falters and stumbles along that cobble stone path to Golgotha. Most likely being tapped on the shoulder with a Roman spear, Simon was compelled to lift the heavy beam off of Jesus' back and carry it to its final destination.
It is this portrait that comes to mind the most when I reflect upon Jesus and who he is. I can relate to that; I have stumbled myself many times under the weight of that cross, not being able to take another step forward without help.
As I was praying this morning, I began to read Psalms 22; we all should know it well. It starts out with that harrowing cry that Jesus made on the cross when he said:
1 My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?
Psalms 22:1 (KJV)
I read these words and as I did, I realized why the portrait of the suffering Savior is so appealing to me. And it's found in the above words. "Why, Why have you forsaken me?" For all my changing and getting clean and opening my heart once again to truths I had long abandoned, I realized that I was still crying those same words. Abandonment is a powerful thing. It can leave you destitute and lost, with little recourse to help yourself.
Let's listen to the Psalmist further, cause it really is an embodiment of the opening words of this chapter; that is, what it meant for David/Jesus to feel forsaken:
why art thou so far from helping me, and from the words of my roaring? 2 O my God, I cry in the daytime, but thou hearest not; and in the night season, and am not silent. [...] 6 But I am a worm, and no man; a reproach of men, and despised of the people. 7 All they that see me laugh me to scorn: they shoot out the lip, they shake the head, saying, 8 He trusted on the LORD that he would deliver him: let him deliver him, seeing he delighted in him. [...] 12 Many bulls have compassed me: strong bulls of Bashan have beset me round. 13 They gaped upon me with their mouths, as a ravening and a roaring lion. 14 I am poured out like water, and all my bones are out of joint: my heart is like wax; it is melted in the midst of my bowels. 15 My strength is dried up like a potsherd; and my tongue cleaveth to my jaws; and thou hast brought me into the dust of death. 16 For dogs have compassed me: the assembly of the wicked have inclosed me: they pierced my hands and my feet. 17 I may tell all my bones: they look and stare upon me. 18 They part my garments among them, and cast lots upon my vesture.
Psalms 22:1a-2, 6-8, 12-17 (KJV)
Hear the anguish in these words interspersed throughout this chapter (there are others but this is enough to illustrate my point)? Allow me please, some latitude as I paraphrase some of these sayings. "Why are you not helping me?" Ever felt that way? I have! "Why are you so far from my crying?" The King James here uses the word roaring. Every time I read that, my mind goes immediately to the Garden of Gethsemane and I hear Jesus roaring, "If it be your will let this cup pass from me..." You don't bleed through your pores without allot of anguish!
"I cry to you day and night and you don't hear me." Translation: you might as well be a million miles away! "My plight brings pleasure to those who would harm me. I am despised and a reproach and men laugh at me and they hate me and no one wants to see me succeed. Look at him, he's pathetic. He cries to his God, but, let us see if his God will come. If you are a/the Son of God, take your own self off the cross--or let your God do it. Maybe then we'll believe in you.
"I am surrounded by dangerous animals!" Usually during Roman crucifixions, four Roman soldiers would box the condemned in and lead him to his death. This is the portrait here that David paints. "They've hurt me! Torn my flesh like roaring lions, my bones are dislodged and I am poured out like water upon the ground. My heart melts and my bowels (emotions) are rotting within me. I hurt!
I have no strength; I can no longer help myself. My jaws ache and my tongue cleaves to the roof of my mouth;" I can't pray anymore. "Dogs compass me about; men and women want to devour me and use me and throw me away." Incidentally, I've often wondered if Jesus looked down from the cross and seen anyone who he had healed or touched or ministered too during his sojourn among us? Just a parenthetical side note, but an interesting thought indeed.
"They have stripped me of my vesture and here I stand, naked and alone. Everything I have of value has been stripped away and I stand before all men, naked and alone and vulnerable." What a portrait of abandonment. I hope I've not depressed you already, because listen, I'm not done yet.
Prayer has been an interesting thing for me lately. I think I understand more fully what Paul was saying when he said that the Holy Spirit helps our infirmities, helping us pray with groaning/utterances which "can not be expressed in words." (Romans 8:26b, NLT) It really feels like I have not bowed for so long that when I do, all I can do is cry. So, there I am praying early this morning, crying again and not really able to express anything but remorse. And then He quickens my mind and I reach for my bible and open it to this chapter.
All of sudden, He spoke. (Let me just answer a critic that is reading this post today. If you can no longer believe in a God that can speak to the heart of man, then you need to fall on your face and ask God to once again show you who He is.) "Chris, you really need to let it go; you need forgive Me." Oh, I was shocked, almost horrified! "Oh, no, surely, I didn't hear that one right. I need to forgive my grandfather and my grandmother for never calling back before she died and colleagues who watched me crash and burn and wagged their finger at me with no consideration for their own vulnerability." All I can say here is,"Oh God, help me please!"
Every morning, most of the day, I bask in His mercy and love. I write these blogs and I feel good about where I am. But, all of sudden, I realized that what He said was true, and it humbled me beyond anything that you can imagine. All my life, at least from the moment I felt called to the ministry and then exploited by the very same church that should have nurtured and directed that call, I have felt lost, on that cross alongside my Savior, crying "why have you forsaken me..." I have faltered and been bowed down in shame under the weight of my calling and cross... and I realized this morning that I have despised God for it...
I understand now why I fought so hard to make myself believe that He really did not exist, at least as I had been taught to believe in Him. It was because I felt abandoned and forsaken. "You lead me to this cross; you put this burden upon me! All You've done is make a spectacle out of me before all who have ever known me. My addictions and failures and pain have all made me a laughing stock before the dogs and people who hate me and wish me nothing but harm. My cries, whether early in the morning or late at night, have all been ignored... and here I sit, with no recourse to help myself. I am broken and hurting and lost and you've been there watching me suffer, as if it pleased you to bruise me... How much more of me can be spilled upon the ground? My God, why have you forsake me?"
You say, "Chris, don't say these things! How arrogant of you to be angry at God!" But, you see, when I hear David and Jesus cry these words, I feel anger, pain, and loss. But, what I realized this morning is that I've never ever been able to make that transition from "why have you forsaken me" to "it is finished!" All the sermons I've preached over the years, prayers I've prayed over hurting people... I was able to comfort others, but myself, I could not save. While the Cross is an ongoing experience in the life of the Christian, it's death is meant to bring life and peace and satisfaction. And while I've always known that, it has never penetrated my heart.
I resisted; I got up from where I was kneeling and I began to walk and tell Him how sorry I was and that I forgive this person and that person and this church and this Bishop and this colleague... My wife and I were talking some time ago and we were discussing forgiveness. See, the people that I hate the most, and I have to own those feelings, are dead and buried and I can't get to them. I can't tell them what they did to me and how they hurt me. My lovely wife, a woman strong in spirit and discernment, told me that those people had stood before God and that God had let them know what they had done... As much as I despise them, I truly believe that they are in heaven, resting in God today. I know what my wife was saying and I believed it to be true, whether or not I wanted to hear it at the time or not.
In an instant, the Holy Spirit spoke to me again, almost ignoring what I was saying. "If you forgive Me, it will take care of them." Oh! "How can you say that to me? How can you be their eternal habitation? Didn't you see what they did to me? They're dogs and bulls and they compassed me about to harm and devour me...." Then came His reply, and I knew it well: "Father forgave them because they didn't know what they were doing...." They know now; they've seen me struggle and seen my pain in a different way; God the Father wiping their tears....
I struggle to bring this to a conclusion today. Tears stain my cheek and fall to the floor as I ponder these truths. The cross: the greatest instrument of torture in my life, that place where I have grown comfortable, accustomed to its pain and hurt and destruction. It's been a familiar place; its laments have been my life's overarching theme. But, I hear God today as I have never heard Him, and I forgive Him. Even as I write these words, I feel a release that I have never felt before. Sure, he didn't really do anything wrong, but I thought he did. Did Jesus really feel forsaken? Absolutely!
As I prayed with my wife last night, I mentioned the picture in Genesis 1 where its says the Spirit hovered over the deep: the expanse of destruction and nothingness. God spoke and the Spirit created. "Let there be light!" Thee Holy Spirit flung the sun, moon, and stars into the heavens. "Let there be dry land!" The Holy Spirit brushed back the waters and made land appear. I feel like I am that expanse of nothingness and He is making me anew, over, doing something in me that I've never known.
I hasten to close; listen, as I draw this to a conclusion, with the other words of this chapter that I did not quote above:
But thou art holy, O thou that inhabitest the praises of Israel. 4 Our fathers trusted in thee: they trusted, and thou didst deliver them. 5 They cried unto thee, and were delivered: they trusted in thee, and were not confounded. [...] 9 But thou art he that took me out of the womb: thou didst make me hope when I was upon my mother's breasts. 10 I was cast upon thee from the womb: thou art my God from my mother's belly. 11 Be not far from me; for trouble is near; for there is none to help. [...] 19 But be not thou far from me, O LORD: O my strength, haste thee to help me. 20 Deliver my soul from the sword; my darling from the power of the dog. 21 Save me from the lion's mouth: for thou hast heard me from the horns of the unicorns. 22 I will declare thy name unto my brethren: in the midst of the congregation will I praise thee. 23 Ye that fear the LORD, praise him; all ye the seed of Jacob, glorify him; and fear him, all ye the seed of Israel. 24For he hath not despised nor abhorred the affliction of the afflicted; neither hath he hid his face from him; but when he cried unto him, he heard. 25 My praise shall be of thee in the great congregation: I will pay my vows before them that fear him. 26 The meek shall eat and be satisfied: they shall praise the LORD that seek him: your heart shall live for ever. 27 All the ends of the world shall remember and turn unto the LORD: and all the kindreds of the nations shall worship before thee. 28 For the kingdom is the LORD'S: and he is the governor among the nations. 29 All they that be fat upon earth shall eat and worship: all they that go down to the dust shall bow before him: and none can keep alive his own soul. 30 A seed shall serve him; it shall be accounted to the Lord for a generation. 31 They shall come, and shall declare his righteousness unto a people that shall be born, that he hath done this.
Pentecost Sunday has always been a mixed bag of emotions for me. Raised in a Pentecostal church, trained theologically in Pentecostal theology, it tends to get lost in the negative feelings that I harbor today, for various reasons. Every Pentecost Sunday, however, I find it convicting because regardless of what I've made it or even what certain churches have made it, there is a valuable meaning, most of which I try, today, to derive from scripture.
Pentecost is one of the oldest feasts celebrated by the New Testament church. Its roots are mostly found in the Feast of Weeks in the Old Testament, roughly fifty days after Passover and traditionally known as the time that the law was given to Moses. That is all the history I am going to deal with but I am sure one of my more capable fellow Bloggers will give a detailed account of its progression, both biblically and traditionally. It's definitely a rich and diverse study well worth its time and attention.
But, I am going to dismiss (at least for a moment) all the tradition and history, and deal exclusively with Acts chapter 2 as we have it today. What made Pentecost? What did it ultimately mean and do for the church of the first century? I really am not concerned with all the extraneous things related to it today as we have it in our various liturgies. However, in the beginning, what was it that made that day special for those people in Jerusalem and why do we still acknowledge it today?
Jesus had ascended, the disciples were no doubt confused and doing the only thing they knew to do: what Jesus said. They gathered together in this room and they began to pray. I wonder what they prayed? Ever consider that? Jewish prayers? I mean, surely there were no Book of Common Prayers, Methodist hymnals, or responsive readings going on in that room that particular day. No, I can only imagine that the prayers being lifted were impromptu prayers that one prays when everything is falling apart - the kind of prayers that one prays when his/her world has stopped turning and he/she has no clue what to do or where to go....
My heart goes out to these men and women gathered, praying, and lost in so many ways. Of course, thankfully, the story doesn't end there or we probably wouldn't be thinking about Pentecost 2000 years later. No. Jesus told them that it was expedient that He go away because another was coming. Remember? (Jn14) What did He mean by that? I can feel my theological resistance rising within me. Another? Himself in different form? A second Savior? What was He saying?
This is where I bow to that which I do not know. But, I watch, in scripture, as it speaks of a stirring. This was the remnant; 120 people left after all the thousands who had heard Jesus' voice and listened as he tried to show them a more excellent way. All those he healed, loved, and liberated; 120 were left and they were praying for what? Even they really didn't know.
Before we go any further, let me quickly identify a few ingredients that I see in that band of people on that first post Easter Pentecost Sunday. First thing I see is that they were all in the same place. Now, that might sound simple. But if one has ever been a church leader, ever tried to lead a function, chair a committee, and/or quell a controversy he/she has found out quickly that people do not naturally herd together well. That is not a harsh criticism; God made us. But, here, they were all together in the same place.
Secondly, and more amazingly, they were in one accord: unity! I wonder how many churches celebrate Pentecost where there is so much division and strife often sitting alongside one another on the very same pew? Don't answer that, please! But, seriously, they were together and in one accord. Did that mean they all knew what was going to happen? Did that mean they all understood it after it happened? I don't think so. But, what I do think it means is that they were all convinced of their need for Jesus. Here, I will turn Pentecostal for a moment: if the church is to ever recapture the energy and Divine intervention that rushed into being that day, it will and must become convinced that its only need is Jesus.
As they were doing all this, something began to happen. You see, when we loose the essence of what scripture speaks about, we replace it with liturgy, tradition, baptisms, etc., don't we? I am not saying for a moment (anyone who reads my blog regularly knows that I have no problem with these things) that these practices need to be phased out. I certainly think the locus of Church history supports much of what we traditionally do today on Pentecost. But, wouldn't it be great to have one Pentecost Sunday somewhere akin to the one here that we're considering today? Has our ideas of God and Divine become so mundane that we confine him/her to liturgy found on page so and so? Can't God do it again?
I know these are rhetorical questions, but I just can't help myself but ask. We could go on and analyze the story further and find ourselves in a quagmire of theological controversy (i.e. what are tongues and what does it mean for the church today?). I don't care about all that. However, the product of Pentecost, and I end this post with this, was that Jesus was once again proclaimed in the streets of Jerusalem. And ultimately, as a result, He was taken to the four corners of the world by these men and women who met together in one place and in one accord. That to me, is the true message of Pentecost Sunday.
There's a story that is recorded in Luke's gospel, chapter 7, that is best known as The Penitent Woman. It's a story that spans the entire body of the Gospel canon, and is somewhat fraught with difficulty. Matthew (26:6-13) and Mark (14:3-9) record the story but in no way indicate that she was a sinner. John (12:1-8) names her "Mary" which has created a tradition that essentially identifies this woman as Mary Magdalene (or Lazarus' sister), one not supported by any interior or extraneous proof. In each record, the host is different (Matthew- Simon the Leper; Mark- just Simon; Luke- Simon the Pharisee; John puts the story in the house of Lazarus ). Even the geographical location is inconclusive (Luke- north in Galilee; Matthew, Mark, and John place it down south in Bethany). The very body part of Jesus that this woman anointed is questionable too, because some of the Evangelist say it was His feet (Luke and John) while others claim it to be His head (Matthew and Mark).
Obviously, this story morphed a bit between the oral transmission phase and when these Evangelist actually began to write things down. Now, I know some might object and say that is not possible, right? The Holy Spirit moved men and scripture was given by complete inspiration and is therefore infallible. I don't even really want to touch that this morning (Please forgive me if that offends you). You can accept it as four different stories with four separate women and three different places; or, one story with multiple incompatible versions. You can elevate human agency in biblical literary construction; all these arguments have valid points, but let's not miss something here by arguing over what I consider to be non-essential.
I am going, therefore, to choose Luke's rendition here because it speaks volumes to me today. In fact, it has taken more than a hour for me to get past the first few sentences of this passage. So, really, there's no need for us to argue over inspiration. There is no question that the Holy Spirit, today, in the 21st century, has taken this narrative and inspired and touched my spirit and I don't care if it actually happened the Lucan way or not. So, now, with all that mess out of the way, let's look at it together:
36 One of the Pharisees asked Jesusj to eat with him, and he went into the Pharisee’s house and took his place at the table.37 And a woman in the city, who was a sinner, having learned that he was eating in the Pharisee’s house, brought an alabaster jar of ointment.38 She stood behind him at his feet, weeping, and began to bathe his feet with her tears and to dry them with her hair. Then she continued kissing his feet and anointing them with the ointment.39 Now when the Pharisee who had invited him saw it, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what kind of woman this is who is touching him—that she is a sinner.”40 Jesus spoke up and said to him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.” “Teacher,” he replied, “speak.”41 “A certain creditor had two debtors; one owed five hundred denarii,k and the other fifty.42 When they could not pay, he canceled the debts for both of them. Now which of them will love him more?”43 Simon answered, “I suppose the one for whom he canceled the greater debt.” And Jesusl said to him, “You have judged rightly.”44 Then turning toward the woman, he said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has bathed my feet with her tears and dried them with her hair.45 You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not stopped kissing my feet.46 You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment.47 Therefore, I tell you, her sins, which were many, have been forgiven; hence she has shown great love. But the one to whom little is forgiven, loves little.”48 Then he said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.”49 But those who were at the table with him began to say among themselves, “Who is this who even forgives sins?”50 And he said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”
The Holy Bible : New Revised Standard Version, Lk 7:36. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1996, c1989.
Okay, first thing I notice here is that Simon has contempt for Jesus. You might object. I mean, if he was contemptuous, then why bring Jesus into his house? Good question! I have no clue. But, Simon ignores common courtesy, customs well entrenched in the first century Mediterranean world. It was common to, at the very least, offer a guest water to wash his feet. In most cases, when a superior entered the home of an inferior, the host would actually wash the feet of the former himself. Simon does none of this. While we are not dealing with the other versions of the story, it was also common to offer water for one to wash their face and oil to anoint it as well. These were common practices ignored by this Pharisee.
When the immoral (perhaps she was a prostitute or married to a publican?) woman entered the house and began to touch Jesus, Simon immediately felt justified: "this man is no prophet! If he was, he would know the character of the woman touching him!" Jesus proves him wrong by revealing the secrets of his heart. "Simon, two men owed debts, one small the other large. When they both could not repay, they were both forgiven and the debt erased. Simon, who do you think was the most thankful?" (my paraphrase) Then, the Pharisee really comes out; "I suppose the one whose debt was the biggest."
Now, my wife has this discerning way about her when I am being sarcastic, even at times when I don't realize it. She'll tell me, "you got this arrogant smirk on your face." I wish I knew what that looked like; obviously I can not hide my contempt very well. Simon must of been the same way. There is "I suppose" and then there's, "I suppose......" Understand what I am saying? The narrative if full of the venom and contempt.
Let me pose a question, one that the text doesn't answer and I can't either; but, was it common for sinful women to just walk into some one's house uninvited? I can see that happening at my house! And, the moment Simon saw her, I wonder why he didn't throw her out? Think about it for a moment.... Was he trying set Jesus up? Stranger things have happened!
Poor Simon really didn't get it; but the woman did! And she is the one I want us to really see today. She walks in with a box of perfume. Luke here says that it was an alabaster jar. The perfume was no doubt expensive, one version saying it was worth 100 denarius. To put it into perspective, a denari was a typical day's wage. Next, not only was the ointment/perfume expensive, but alabaster was a precious white stone out which small vessels were made to hold precious things. So, the jar/box was precious and the perfume/ointment was as well.
She comes in, breaks the seal and begins to sits at Jesus' feet. Now, I like where Luke puts her, and I'll tell you why. Here is woman, obviously scorned and unworthy; she comes in with the most precious thing she can afford (which lends credence to the idea that she might actually have been a prostitute) and she walks up to Jesus and all she can do is sit behind him, at his feet. That isn't usually what we do when we bring our gifts to him, is it? Oh, well, she was sinner! So, am I! But, I usually stroll boldly before him and make sure that he knows what it is I am offering! "Look! Jesus, I threw out those books you didn't want me to have! I gave up drugs, immoral behaviors! I am even going to an E-V-errrrr, an Evangelical church!!!" She doesn't do this.
The portrait in the Greek is of one who is overcome with love and emotion. Sitting at His feet had such a dramatic effect on this woman! Now, this story has been used often to describe the fact that love covers a multitude of sins. If you love much, you'll be forgiven much. It's as if, love is the catalyst, the barter, if you will, for forgiveness. But, that is not what is happening here.
Zerwick comments: “The context, however, renders the interpretation just referred to almost impossible; for Our Lord goes on at once to add, ‘but he to whom less is forgiven, loves less,’ with evident reference to the parable whereby He had shown Simon that the greater mercy calls forth the greater love of gratitude…The sense demanded by the context…is ‘she loves because she is forgiven,’ and not ‘she is forgiven because she loves.’ And this is in fact the sense of the Greek expression, so long as the hoti is understood in the special causal sense which gives the reason not why the fact is so, but whereby it is known to be so”
M. Zerwick, Graecitasbiblica (4th ed.; Rome, 1960). Numbers correspond to English tr., Biblical Greek (Rome, 1963) [emphasis added]
So, what isgoing on here? She comes in, whether she was put up to it by someone who was trying to offend or test Jesus, we will never know. But, she comes up behind Jesus as he is reclining at Simon's table. Surely, she came in with some kind of intent or desire, one that may forever be lost to us. But sitting there at his feet began to move her and she saw her neediness. That neediness lead to an internal estimation of her condition and that lead to her forgiveness. This woman was forgiven before Jesus ever opened his mouth!
I really messed up last night; when I came home my heart was so heavy. I went to an NA meeting, not because I really felt like I had too, but I just thought it might be helpful for someone else (yeah, I am an arrogant expletive!). While there, the idea of God came up and the "of your own understanding" of any 12 step program was discussed and I don't know, the ugly old cynic just came flooding to the surface. I know what "higher power" means. God knows I wouldn't be here today if He wasn't with me. But, it was just that "of your own understanding" part that irritated me. No, I couldn't share my faith, but I took it upon myself to try and destroy any one's notion of God that did not mesh with what I thought was logical.
My argument? If I can understand God, he is not big enough to fix my problems. I understand addiction and drugs and alcoholism and all that stuff. But if something/someone is big enough to help me, then He is going to have to be bigger than my intelligence. And don't assault my sensibilities by saying that I can choose a rock or a door knob or a scratching post; oh, the arrogance! If a doorknob could help me beat my addictions don't you think I'd of been anointing and praying to door knobs everywhere? I would be praying to every tree or rock... no, if I can touch it, see it, taste it, it can't help me!
Don't you think for a minute that I didn't sit there and bite my tongue and shift in my seat and almost got up and walked out without even saying a word. But, no, there again, not my nature; I am a loud mouth idiot who has to get his point across and have the last word in most cases (even if I don't even really believe what I am saying: argue simply for argument's sake!), and I did. And let me tell you, for a moment, it felt good. But, when I got done, looking at the faces of the men and women sitting there who may not of been able to accept my idea of God (as if I even tried to define that!), I immediately heard Jesus speak, "you deny Me before men, I will deny you before my Father." (Matthew 10:33; my paraphrase) I was and am so ashamed!
Did I ever step into that one! I went home under conviction. I went to bed with it, and I woke up with it. I can only imagine that it was the Holy Spirit that quickened this story to my mind and as I sat down to do my ritual blog. I opened this passage of scripture, and the portrait of this woman sitting at the Master's feet, somehow stirred my spirit. I feel sorry for those whose faith has no passion. I've been there, and I know what it feels like. Never, again, do I want to be left to my own devices, my own intellect, to figure things out and somehow make them right.
I mentioned earlier that it took me more than an hour to get to where I could begin to think about writing about this passage. Why? Because I saw myself in this woman. Waking this morning and putting my feet on the floor and going through the motions of the daily rituals, knowing that I had hurt my Savior the night before, was almost more than I could take. I sat down at this computer thinking, I will make it right, with my alabaster jar and precious ointment in my hands. And then, all my thoughts and intellect, sensibilities, were overwhelmed by this portrait of a woman, an immoral woman, who met Jesus where she could: at his feet!
"Jesus! I have a gift for you today! Let me offer to you this talent or that. I am going to clean my house for your glory; I am going to love my wife and my children today!" The more I tried to stand upright and meet Him face to face, the more and more I realized that I could do nothing more than what this immoral woman did: sit at his feet. You know, sometimes being at His feet is the most beautiful, comforting place you can be.
This woman is filled with forgiveness and as such, her tears begin to overflow and she wipes her tears away with her hair, essentially washing his feet. He didn't even have to say a word to me this morning. It wasn't my talents, my business, my devotion to family and friends that He wanted. As I sat there and cried alongside this woman, the alabaster jar of my heart was broken and repentance and "I'm sorry" flowed out with overwhelming passion. I truly was and am so sorry!
I don't care what the Simon's of the world do. I've been there, done that, got the tee-shirt and I couldn't disdain a faith perspective any less. I can admit that I don't understand. All I know, is that I was forgiven so much, and in return, I love much! No longer can I meet Him face to face; I find comfort at His feet, my tears staining His skin.
What does this mean for you today? May you know His forgiveness, love, and compassion. May you realize today that He doesn't need your talents or anything, but your heart. May you, just as I, find comfort and solace at His feet. The man/woman who is forgiven much, will love much. May that be true in me! May it be true in you as well!
Surrender is a difficult thing, is it not? As a child, I remember many times singing the hymn written in 1886 by Judson W. Van DeVenter, "I Surrender All." Maybe its just a Pentecostal thing, but very few times do I remember singing that song that I did not feel the Spirit of God moving me, wooing me, speaking to me: "Surrender all, give Me everything." Surely, you remember the song:
1. All to Jesus I surrender; All to Him I freely give; I will ever love and trust Him, In His presence daily live.
* Refrain: I surrender all, I surrender all; All to Thee, my blessed Savior, I surrender all.
2. All to Jesus I surrender; Humbly at His feet I bow, Worldly pleasures all forsaken; Take me, Jesus, take me now.
3. All to Jesus I surrender; Make me, Savior, wholly Thine; Let me feel the Holy Spirit, Truly know that Thou art mine.
4. All to Jesus I surrender; Lord, I give myself to Thee; Fill me with Thy love and power; Let Thy blessing fall on me.
5. All to Jesus I surrender; Now I feel the sacred flame. Oh, the joy of full salvation! Glory, glory, to His Name!!
I think of that song this morning because I stand at the precipice of something greater, something more wonderful, yet terrifying, than I have ever known. My wife, lover, and companion spoke that into my spirit last night, and I knew, as the old timers used to say, deep down in my "knower"[sic] that what she said was true. I am not one to run rabbit trails but I am learning that my greatest asset and the one who can move my spirit the most, by His power, is my beautiful wife. I could write a book on the intricacies and all the things that fascinate me and intrigue me about that woman; all I can say today, however, is that I am one blessed man!
The whole time we were talking and reflecting, my mind was wandering off to a scripture that I had read, even preached, numerous times over the years. Jeremiah 6:14:
They have also healed the hurt of My people slightly, Saying, 'Peace, peace!' When there is no peace. (NKJV)
It is kind of odd because Jeremiah says the very same thing again, in the 8th chapter. This is obviously the time of the prophet's early ministry; a time when he is seeing things and hearing things that he doesn't fully understand. It's difficult to date. Men with more expertise than I have wrestled with the problem and the only consensus that seems to prevail is that Jeremiah began to speak sometime after the death of Josiah (639-608), a righteous man who fell in battle at Megiddo, and the eleven year reign of Jehoiachim (608-597). The important thing to note, however, is the state of the people. They had turned from righteousness to gross immorality and sin. God raises this prophet up to decry the injustices being perpetrated by the people upon a benevolent and compassionate God who simply did not deserve their disobedience or insolence. Sound familiar? It should; this is not the first time they had been there nor would it be the last, unfortunately.
While looking at these two parallel scriptures, I noticed something that had never really drawn my attention before. Chapters 7-11 are believed to be oracular fragments, inserted (perhaps late) to fully describe the state of the people, and presumably, to justify the utter destruction and calamity that would later befall them. Chapter seven caught my attention most. Listen for moment:
1 The word that came to Jeremiah from the LORD: 2 Stand in the gate of the LORD's house, and proclaim there this word, and say, Hear the word of the LORD, all you people of Judah, you that enter these gates to worship the LORD. 3 Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel: Amend your ways and your doings, and let me dwell with you in this place. 4 Do not trust in these deceptive words: "This is the temple of the LORD, the temple of the LORD, the temple of the LORD." 5 For if you truly amend your ways and your doings, if you truly act justly one with another, 6 if you do not oppress the alien, the orphan, and the widow, or shed innocent blood in this place, and if you do not go after other gods to your own hurt, 7 then I will dwell with you in this place, in the land that I gave of old to your ancestors forever and ever. 8 Here you are, trusting in deceptive words to no avail. 9 Will you steal, murder, commit adultery, swear falsely, make offerings to Baal, and go after other gods that you have not known, 10 and then come and stand before me in this house, which is called by my name, and say, "We are safe!"--only to go on doing all these abominations? 11 Has this house, which is called by my name, become a den of robbers in your sight? You know, I too am watching, says the LORD.
Jer 7:1-11 (NRSV)
Sometimes, I feel sorry for Jeremiah. He's been known as the weeping prophet, the one without a single convert, the unpatriotic man. Here, he is being called upon to stand in the very gate of the Temple in an unprecedented way and decry the sins of the people. Try that next Sunday! See how well it goes over. One commentator says that a practical atheism had overtaken these people. While they went through ritual and believed in the God of their fathers in some form, they had become cold and indifferent. Consequently, everything they did was an abomination to God.
Let's listen to the prophet. What is he saying? "You're going through the motions, perhaps even doing the right things, but your heart's not in it." Sounds like a church I recall in Ephesus who had lost her first love. (Rev 3) Jeremiah is standing in the very doorway of the temple complex and he's essentially saying, "God is not here! Amend your ways, change, turn around, repent; and He will once again dwell in this place and in you."
This is a rhetorical question, but an important one. How many churches are going through the motions, pastors sitting at their desk on Saturday night constructing polished sermons, worship committees putting together liturgies for the next day, without God, any semblance of life, or the slightest bit of change in the lives of the people? I read earlier this morning of a Presbyterian minister and church who had chosen to study the Koran in 2010. Now, please don't misunderstand me here; I don't really care what you call yourself. But, if your faith, your religion is nothing more than a catalog of intellectual pursuits and ideals and mechanistic refrains to a set of platitudinal constructs, then maybe, you need to hear what Jeremiah is saying.
He's speaking to the congregation, but I feel that he is talking directly to me. The people obviously respond, "Look! See! We still have this temple - this monument resident within our midst! Surely, you are wrong, Jeremiah! This is His very dwelling place..." Obviously, they had forgotten the words of the Psalmist, "Some trust in chariots, and some in horses: but we will remember the name of the LORD our God." Psalms 20:7 (KJV) "I can still quote John 3:16; I remember way back when when God did 'this' or 'that'. I go to church. I attend Sunday School. I have this position or that. I sing on the worship team, for God's sake!"
The horrifying thing to me about this passage and their arrogant response is that they had no clue that God wasn't there and that impending doom and destruction (the likes of which this southern kingdom had never known) was knocking at their very door.
Jeremiah continues, in spite of their objections: "Amend your ways, stop doing what you're doing! The Temple isn't going to save you, but if you change (repent), God promises to dwell with you." Let's step out this for a moment and into the New Testament. There's a fledgling Christian faith, built upon the person of Jesus (once considered a rogue Jewish sect), that begins to assert its own identity. Obviously, Paul writes to the Corinthians prior to the destruction of the second Temple in 70 C. E., and most scholars date the writing sometime in the mid first century.
Paul defines a new paradigm:
16 Do you not know that you are God's temple and that God's Spirit dwells in you? [you is plural; i.e. church]17 If anyone destroys God's temple, God will destroy that person. For God's temple is holy, and you are that temple.
1 Cor 3:16-17 (NRSV; "you" is plural; i.e. church)
Paul introduces this concept while dealing with dissension - sin (a word we've almost completely written out of faith altogether). Those of us without Jewish origins or roots can not fully appreciate the magnitude of what Paul says here. While most within the Corinthian church were not necessarily Jewish, they no doubt understood what Jewish faith was all about. Jesus was a Jew. Paul was Jew. Almost all of the men that the Corinthians's were arguing over regarding whose baptism was more relevant, were Jews.
These gentiles knew enough to know that, for a Jew, the Temple was a complex of buildings in Jerusalem where ritual and worship took place. While it stood, it was the central focus of Jewish worship and spiritual identity. Here, Paul turns the tables on them and says, "You're the temple, individually, and collectively." Another Jew, Peter, who often had difficulty embracing his non-Jewish position within the church, writes:
5 And now God is building you, as living stones, into his spiritual temple. What's more, you are God's holy priests, who offer the spiritual sacrifices that please him because of Jesus Christ
1 Peter 2:5 (NLT)
There is some very intriguing information contradicting the fact that Peter wrote this, which is interesting but not consequential, to me at least. However, if Peter wrote this, then he also probably did so, prior to the destruction of the actual second Temple (perhaps in mid 60 C.E.?). And I can assure that this was sovereign divine revelation to Peter; it was no doubt a much bigger deal to Peter than to Paul. But even Peter has made this transition and He tells them that they are lively stones (KJV) being built together as a spiritual house (a perpetual habitation) for the Lord of Glory! (my paraphrase)
Now, let's once again, briefly, turn our attention back to the Jerusalem of the 6th century B.C.E and Jeremiah as he speaks to the people. "Let me dwell with you in this place..." I find this interesting. You would have thought that God would have constructed it the other way around, right? I mean, His Temple, His earth, His people... but no, He tells them that if you change, amend your ways, I will dwell with you.
Hasn't the Father coming down in the cool of the day to walk with Adam always been man's honor? Jesus accomplished the impossible on the cross. He bridged a gap we simply could not so that He could once again dwell with us. I think I understand now more fully what Moses meant when he heard God say that He was going to send the angel of the Lord before the people, but because of their impudence and rebellion, He would simply track them from afar. Moses cried, "If You don't go with us, then don't move us. How are we to be recognized as anything distinct, (different) than any other peoples on the earth if You are not with us?" (Ex 33, my paraphrase)
Oh my! Here's the rub. I don't care whether you're a Christian, Buddhist, Muslim, etc. It really does not concern me, at the moment, which path you walk. Sure, I could tell you what I think, but it's not my purpose here. But, I can say with utter certainty that what this world is lacking (and you can interject peace and unilateral prosperity, acceptance of others, and all the propaganda you can devise) is the presence of a God that is bigger than hunger, calamity, tragedy, and pain. The very same thing in our text, is happening in Jerusalem; the more Jeremiah preaches their impending doom, the louder the false prophets get. "All you need is peace. Learn to live together in harmony. Heal the planet, hug a Muslim, bridge the gaps between you and others. Peace, safety, all of it can be ours through our human genius and ingenuity!"
I don't know about you, but I can see the futility in that with little effort. Sure, I'd love to see it happen, but it never will - unless the glory of the Lord covers the earth as the waters cover the sea! It's the presence, the God among us, that spans the chasm of man's darkness and calls him forth into marvelous light! These sooth Sayers, these wicked lying clueless prophets were simply putting a band-aid on a rupture. Jeremiah tells them, "You've healed their wounds slightly; you make them feel better about themselves with the multitude of worthless platitudes and cliche's and songs about world peace--the end of war and famine and sending a few dollars here or there to feed the starving children. The calamity of calamities is about to befall you, and you're trusting in the wrong thing. "
A catalog of wrongs follow, and this list is repeated and revised and added too throughout the writings of Jeremiah. The laments of Jeremiah, the weeping of this Prophet much later shows us that these people never really listened; and it got so much worse. I can make excuses all day about why I don't do "this", why I can't forgive, why my attitude stinks, etc. but, in the end, it really is about surrender. In essence, that is all God was asking of these people. "If you truly change and if you turn around and stop oppressing the strangers and orphans among you, those who don't belong; if you will stop devouring one another, shedding innocent blood, and most importantly, choose your side. Stop following after other gods... if you're going serve me, serve me! Stop making excuses of why its okay for you do "this" instead of what I've asked of you. Stop! Listen! If you will, I promise, I will dwell with you right here! Right in your home, while you're sitting around the dinner table with your family. I will be a very present help in time of need. I will always be with you, even till the end of the aeon." How beautiful! God says that He will dwell in our place; right where we are!
Oh, so your Temple is ruined. Shame and guilt and condemnation has overtaken you and even your ritual doesn't mean near what it used too. He is standing at the door today - the door to my heart and to yours, and He cries through this beloved prophet, "Amend, change, stop, turn around! I treasure you and I will dwell in you again, just like I did before."
Lastly, this morning, one of the names of God came rushing to my mind at the same time as this scripture that I have shared with you: Jehovah Rafa. It literally means, the God who stitches back together. So you're torn, your garments have been weathered and battered, beaten and ripped from the events of life and your own choices. You are bleeding and bruised. Your bones are broken and you're hurting and you don't know where God is because it feels as if He is a million miles away.
The prophet stands at the gate this morning, today, and he says, "Change. Just stop. I will dwell with you; you will be the most blessed and hold within your being and spirit the greatest treasure the world has ever known. I will be their God and they shall be my people. I will dwell within them, walk in them, tabernacle within them; within you." Don't we create most our own messes? Surrender! Give it all; hold nothing back. Calamity, plight, pain and destruction does not, and hear me this day, have to be your latter end. The God who made you can stitch it all back together, heal you, and make you anew. His mercies are from everlasting to everlasting, and they're renewed every morning!
Ever had an ah-ha moment? One of those times when you hear something you've heard for years but never really understood, but for some reason you suddenly realize, I get that now! Gayle Erwin was at our church yesterday; a dear old man of God who is full of God's grace and love, as well as a gifted writer and speaker.
It was the Sunday before Memorial day, obviously, so my spiritual sensibilities had already been assaulted by a nationalistic video played prior to Gayle coming on stage. I told my wife how amazing it is that every time I go to that church (Calvary Chapel of the Triad), it's as if God just somehow someway puts a muzzle on me and makes me sit there and listen. Now, that might be funny to you, but I aint [sic] digging it sometime!
Erwin is big these days in explaining the nature of God; a task I am glad he feels up too.... It's like explaining the nature of the wind or trying to answer the question of how big is our Universe? What is the true nature of a black hole? You get me; I love the man but I found that statement almost arrogant. Explain the nature of God???? Yeah! Okay! So I sit back and I had this arrogant "show me" kind of attitude. I know, honesty sucks! Ha!
Then he does it. He says (and I paraphrase), if you can understand the name of God you can then understand his nature. Well, that sounded okay to me, theoretically. But, really, think about it for a moment. Names are not for us, are they? I know who I am. Descartes said: "I think, therefore I am." Not, I am named, therefore I am...." Okay, I like splitting hairs. It's my Blog! LOL But, really, my name means more to someone else than to me, right? So, in scripture, when God uses names such as Jehovah or Elohim or Jesus, those names are for our benefit to give glimpses into who he is. Metaphors employed, such as shepherd, father, bridegroom, brother, etal., are also used to show us portraits of facets of who God is and His place among us as a people. It's not necessarily to box God in; surely He's not a shepherd in a classical sense or a father, etc., but those metaphoric roles give us something that we as human constructs can relate too.
So, back to the whole name thing and Erwin's, know God's name/understand his nature comment. Erwin began to relay the story of Moses, who while up on the mountain Sinai (or Tent of Meeting, its not clear to me), asked the Lord to show him His glory. Now, this is in Exodus 33; there is another rendition of this in the very next chapter. One chapter he proclaims His name, the next He just shows up kind of impromptu and does essentially the same thing, with more elaborate detail. It was this latter that Erwin refers too:
5 Then the LORD came down in a pillar of cloud and called out his own name, "the LORD," as Moses stood there in his presence. 6 He passed in front of Moses and said, "I am the LORD, I am the LORD, the merciful and gracious God. I am slow to anger and rich in unfailing love and faithfulness. 7 I show this unfailing love to many thousands by forgiving every kind of sin and rebellion[....]
Ex 34:5-7a (NLT, emphasis added)
Notice the ellipses in brackets on the end there? I put them there because Erwin didn't finish the verse.
Even so I do not leave sin unpunished, but I punish the children for the sins of their parents to the third and fourth generations."
Ex 34:7b (NLT)
Before I go further this morning, let me go back to the other rendition or initial introduction to this whole event, depending on how you choose to look at it:
18 Then Moses had one more request. "Please let me see your glorious presence," he said.
19 The LORD replied, "I will make all my goodness pass before you, and I will call out my name, `the LORD,' to you. I will show kindness to anyone I choose, and I will show mercy to anyone I choose.
Ex 33:18-19 (NLT)
I am sitting there in that church and immediately my mind goes, NO HE DIDN'T!!!! He also said that God uses jerks, by the way, so keep reading.... LOL I have always, always, ALWAYS hated that verse! Horror! "No he didn't just claim to hate a bible verse, did he?!?" YES, I did! I have never understood it; it has always sounded self serving and exclusionary to me. Even six years in Evangelical ministry could never make me pick that thing up as a text. First of all, who doesn't want their most notable national patriarch to be the only one who knows God and talks to Him face to face? Secondly, compassion on whom he chooses to show it?!? Holding children and grandchildren AND great-great-great-grandchildren complicit and accountable for/in my sin? I am sorry, but over the years that's a part of God's name (and if so, his nature) that I have just not been able to accept.
I was all flustered, but it was as if all of a sudden, the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said, "Chris, (and I love it when I hear Him speak my name), you do not have to look at it that way." But, I don't like and I, I, I.... every objection fell before His feet. "Chris, you're looking at it all wrong." Okay, now that was offensive! LOL Arrogance, oh God! He's proving to be the most patient and merciful friend I've ever had. And while the portrait of God smiting anyone is hard for me, if I was Him, I'd smite my own self sometimes. But He is loving and long-suffering... ever looked at that word, long-suffering? It means exactly what it says. Suffering is not abstract and it lasts a LONG time! It reminds me of Jesus in Matthew 17 (healing of the lunatic son) when He said, how long must I suffer with you idiots (my paraphrase!) ?
God continued to speak to me as Erwin continued: "I can show mercy and I canwithhold it; but, Chris, everything you know about me tells you that I take no delight in the death of the wicked." My wife and I were talking just last night and I remembered that scripture in Hosea 11 where God speaks of Ephraim:
1 "When Israel was a child, I loved him as a son, and I called my son out of Egypt. 2 But the more I called to him, the more he rebelled, offering sacrifices to the images of Baal and burning incense to idols. 3 It was I who taught Israel how to walk, leading him along by the hand. But he doesn't know or even care that it was I who took care of him. 4 I led Israel along with my ropes of kindness and love. I lifted the yoke from his neck, and I myself stooped to feed him.
Hosea 11:1-4 (NLT)
It was as if God was saying to me, "I am sorry, Chris, that I couldn't work it out in a way more palatable to your 21st century sensibilities. The world I created was perfect and the man I made was perfect but when it went wrong, the world went bad too. And, it is harsh and ugly and cold and dark and people die and children go to sleep at night hungry and war threatens civilization at every turn and...nothing in this world is the way its suppose to be, and I don't like it anymore than you do. But, I did something about it."
You can't see me this morning, but tears stain my face as I write this. David writes in Psalms 85:10:
Mercy and truth are met together; righteousness and peace have kissed each other. (KJV)
Over the years, I am certain I have read that verse a hundred times. So much as been written about it, its language and beauty are unparalleled in Hebrew scripture. Mercy and truth both seek different ends. Mercy cries for relief and help and hope, while truth speaks of just desserts and getting what one deserves. They pass each other, one going to entreat for the sins of man, another bound to bring justice to the earth. In a moment - in an instant, the conflict was over. Gazing upon one another in the person of Jesus, the left hand of exclusion met the right hand of acceptance. One kissed another and the conflict was ended, forever.
In the New Testament, Paul puts it this way:
...Jesus Christ, the Son of God, never wavers between yes and no. He is the one whom Timothy, Silas, and I preached to you, and he is the divine Yes—God's affirmation.20 For all of God's promises have been fulfilled in him. That is why we say "Amen" when we give glory to God through Christ.
2 Cor 1:17-20 (NLT, emphasis added)
Why couldn't I see that before? Years of questioning, wondering if I had chosen the right God. Nights of fear and bitterness over why God seemingly loved some and hated me. Oh my, that is the issue. "You've accepted him or her and you did this or that for this person and look at my plight, God! Look at me! Why can't I see your glory, why can't I be your friend..... why do I hurt and why, with nine children and a lovely wife and everything I could ever want or need, why am I so alone???"
It's the dichotomy of, "my God, my God, why have you forsaken me" and "Father forgive them for they know not what they do." The very same Jesus who says "Yes!" is the very same Jesus who also felt the exclusionary "No!" He came to his own and his own didn't receive him; that's classic rejection. How often did he retreat to the mountains in Paneas to pray because he was grieved in spirit, hurt, if you will. The writer of Hebrews puts it this way:
[I]t was necessary for Jesus to be in every respect like us, his brothers and sisters, so that he could be our merciful and faithful High Priest before God. He then could offer a sacrifice that would take away the sins of the people.
Heb 2:17 (NLT)
And then again:
14 That is why we have a great High Priest who has gone to heaven, Jesus the Son of God. Let us cling to him and never stop trusting him. 15 This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same temptations we do, yet he did not sin. 16 So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it.
Heb 4:14-16 (NLT)
God, I hurt! "I know." Jesus, I've been abused and used and people have seen me as nothing but a means to an end! "I know, I've been there, son." My family has despised me and my father and mother rejected me, abandoned, leaving me alone... 'I know that too!" I don't know how to do all the things your asking me, God... "It's okay.", comes the reply.
"Mercy and truth were headed along the same road one day, both deposed on your behalf: one to argue for and another against you. Not man, not humanity, not the world, but Me! I fought for you that day; I wrestled truth and mercy together until they kissed in abandoned embrace. So, now, I've felt your pain, heard your cries and desperation, been right there sitting in the very seat you occupy this morning. But, I have also seen your healing, your restoration, your future, your end."
Last evening, my wife and I were reading various scriptures and talking and she spoke one to me that I have always liked but had mixed emotions about:
11 For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope.
Jer 29:11 (NLT)
What a beautiful verse and I accept it. But it's the preceding verse that's always troubled me. Jeremiah is writing to the captives in Babylon who are wanting and expecting God's deliverance to come any moment. The prophet tells them otherwise, and if you study it out, he paid a heavy price for it, being considered false and unpatriotic:
10 "The truth is that you will be in Babylon for seventy years.
Jer 29:10a (NLT)
That is not what they wanted to hear: truth, judgment. But, this whole passage personifies the meeting of mercy and truth along the way in such profound and beautiful ways. I apologize for breaking it up the way I have, but let's put it all together:
10 "The truth is that you will be in Babylon for seventy years. But then I will come and do for you all the good things I have promised, and I will bring you home again. 11 For I know the plans I have for you," says the LORD. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. 12 In those days when you pray, I will listen. 13 If you look for me in earnest, you will find me when you seek me. 14 I will be found by you," says the LORD. "I will end your captivity and restore your fortunes. I will gather you out of the nations where I sent you and bring you home again to your own land."
Jer 29:10-14 (NLT, emphasis added)
So you ask, "what does all this have to do with me today?". Oh, I am so glad you asked that question! What is God saying here? "Chris, I know your hurt, you were sexually and physically abused. I know the very people who were entrusted to care for you were the very ones who devastated you the most. I've seen every tear, heard every cry, I've even wept for you myself. I've seen you in captivity to drugs and alcohol, I have watched you struggle as a father and a husband. Over the years, when you stumbled, I picked you up. When you couldn't help yourself, I did. You see, you haven't always been able to see past the unpleasantness of the moment, the pain. It can be blinding. You've been homesick and fatherless, and I've watched over you, holding your hand when you tried to walk, drawing you, sometimes when you least wanted it, with cords of my everlasting love.
But, listen Chris, never, not for an instance, have I ever forgotten who you are. Never, have I ever abandoned my plans and purposes for you. Your friends, your family, your colleagues forgot who you were and are, but not I. My plans and purposes for you were woven inextricably in my love for you on the Cross of Calvary and nothing, no one, can ever, will ever, take that away from you. You're coming home! And when you cry, I will hear; when you seek me, you will find me. And hear this, I have ended your captivity and restored your fortunes!"
I hear that this morning; ringing in my spirit so loudly that it's almost deafening. But, it's not just me, is it? You hear it too. God is speaking, not just to me, but to many of you with similar narratives and pain. "...God saves those who are crushed in spirit!" (Psalms 34:18, NASV 1977, emphasis added) Please, don't let the moment pass. Restoration is just a cry away!
I leave you this morning with a song sung by CeCeWinans:
